I was not assigned any work at 'work' today hence I am extremely free.
So free, in fact, that I actually took some time out to fill out a 'planet pulse' survey form in hopes that I may win a Blackberry. Pftt. As if.
So free, in fact, I even checked my 'spam mail'. Apparently, I get a lot of mail regarding viagra. Mind you, I didn't open the emails. Though, I just may do so if someone is interested in knowing about this 80% discount on viagra.
So free, in fact, I am actually a quarter through someone's master dissertation on 'self advocacy' which is 205 pages long.
So free, in fact, I could play random games on this website http://www.lumosity.com/ and noone would actually care.
So free, in fact, that I decided to rant on blogspot.
Seriously, they really shouldn't have agreed to accept me if they were already going to have 8 chambering pupils. Oh well, at least I get some pocket money. That is as long as the guy of whose car I scratched does not call me back with a mechanic's bill.
Oh, btw, Happy New Year~!
If everything were a Game
Been reading a novel by James Patterson called 'Pop Goes the Weasel'.
In the book, the serial killer is playing a rpg (role playing game) where he is the character named 'Death'. The only problem is that he has taken his 'fantasies' to a whole new level. He has started to live them out in real life, ie. he is killing people in real life. His life is his game.
It got me thinking, maybe life IS a game.
But, we are the only ones. As in, we ourselves, each individual creates our own rules for our own life. The serial killer chooses to kill according to the number that appears on the dice. We choose our own next moves by whatever method we choose to help us make decisions.
Life is a Game we play with ourselves.
Others can give you all the advice but you are always on your own for the next move.
You choose. Yes, we have freewill but it is a lonely game we play.
How have you chosen to play the game?
Forgiveness
So remember that when you practice what ever evil that is in your heart.
There is no forgiveness.
There is just what comes next.
There is only pain, guilt and the misery of knowing who you are. And what you did.
So don't do it. Just stop before it's too late."
BUT,
"Forgiveness is Love"
- Dan Scott, One Tree Hill
Despite his confusing messages, I'd be damned if I had a grandpa who looked like this!
Grandpa ok? With a 7 year old grandkid! I wanna look that good when I'm old. HAHA!
Fascination with Detachment
It is odd but I think I have a innate fascination with detachment or do majority of the population have the same pull?
There are 2 songs that have always managed to really suck me in and they are:
1. 'Fake Plastic Trees' by Radiohead
2. 'Wish You Were Here' by Pink Floyd
Both these songs have a similar theme to them and that centers around the chaos of urban living and how that leaves us just a little 'detached', just a little 'fake'.
---
'Fake Plastic Trees'
According to Thom, this song is about Canary Warf in London.
The area was supposed to be a major business district, but it was hurt by a market downturn in the '90s. Canary Wharf was landscaped with a lot of artificial plants, which is where the title came from.
The area was supposed to be a major business district, but it was hurt by a market downturn in the '90s. Canary Wharf was landscaped with a lot of artificial plants, which is where the title came from.
'Wish you were here'
This song is about the detached feeling most people go through life with. It is a commentary on how people cope with the world by withdrawing physically, mentally, or emotionally.
Roger Waters has said this song was based on a poem he wrote about Syd Barrett's fall from reality. It was said that Syd's friends would lace his coffee with LSD, which eventually lead to his mental breakdown.
The theme of the album is absence. They chose this as the title track because it summed up the message.The album contains images relating to the theme of detachment. The most prominent image shows 2 businessmen shaking hands, with one of them on fire. This represents an insincere business deal, with one of the men about to get burned. In all of the images, there is something missing, like the diver who does not make a splash.
---
Or, maybe I have just been duped into liking a very catchy melody line. HEHE!
Idealism is a hard thing to shed
Some adults in my house have lived 60% of a century.
And, what they have just pointed out to me today is...
Love does NOT conquer all.
Images of ponies, castles, princes, princesses and forever glowing rainbows, crushed.
Idealism from childhood, MAY have come to an end today.
May...
'Cause I still want to believe.
Tell it...
... tell this feeling to go away please.
I thought this feeling of detachment, depression and withdrawal temptations have gone away.
Apparently, once one has been to that darkness, it is easy to fall back into it.
Like standing at the edge of a cliff with my back facing outward. Never knowing which step I take will make me fall again.
Please don't make me fall again. I try to be strong but sometimes I feel the need to be sucked in.
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